"Do you have a seat open?"
"Not at the moment sir. However, I can you put you on the list."
"Yes, I can really put you on the list."
"No, I meant, there really isn't a seat open? It's looks there there are seats open."
"Right. Except that.... there aren't. Really."
"You don't have to be a dick."
"And you don't have to call me names because you can't get what you want instantly."
"You are kind of a jerk."
"I know. Who's next?"